Tag Archives: Denial

What Do You Do To Handle A Big Challenge? Have You Tried Responsibility?

43014We all have been there.  Just when we think we have life handled, here comes a challenge, one that we haven’t had before and perhaps have no reference to look to for how to handle it.  So what do you do?

The standard way of facing a challenge is the same way we handle most things that stymy us.  We handle it in stages.  The first stage is denial.  You know, it’s not real, it will go away and leave you alone.  However, no matter how long you deny it, it just sits there waiting to be handled.  You peek out from under the covers, and there it is.

The second stage is blaming someone or something else for making this our problem.  Again, this is another form of denial, and we search in some very creative places to find out what plague has put this challenge in our life.  We resort to all sorts of information that will say that this challenge isn’t our fault, and perhaps look to the information for the answer.  Ever tried reading Tarot cards, I Ching or astrological signs?  Maybe a planet is in retrograde?

Of course, the challenge still sits there waiting for us to handle it.  So there we are; we can’t deny it’s there, and even if the planet is in retrograde, it’s not going to make it go away.  So what is next?

We could jump the stages and simply be responsible.

Be responsible and own the challenge.  What do I mean by that?  Be willing to say, “Somehow, and maybe I don’t know how, I caused this challenge to occur.  I can own it and I am responsible for handling it.”  Responsibility is a very powerful tool.  Being responsible is powered by a power much greater than blame, guilt and shame.  It gets you out of the blame/victim cycle, which is never creative nor energetic.

Once you can honestly say, “I am responsible for this challenge”, it releases much of the energy surrounding it and it becomes simply another problem that needs to be solved.  Then you can call together your circle of colleagues and friends who have demonstrated their commitment to your success and ask them to “Master Mind” a solution with you.  Notice that I said, with you, not for you.  I am interested to hear from you about how you handle challenges and if you have tried simply being responsible for it.  If so, please say how it has worked out for you.  I look forward to your comments!

 

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