Have you ever really thought about the verb: to try? As in, have you tried that new restaurant? Or, I tried to finish the marathon. Or, I tried to make my business a success.
When I was young, every time I gave up on something—often after expending little effort towards reaching the goal—and told my father, “I tried,” he would respond, “Trying don’t count, its results that do.” – Tweet That! He never let me off the hook with the explanation, “I tried.” With him I was doomed to actually do the thing, rather than try.
So let’s look at this verb try, and see where you may be using it perhaps a little too much (at least by my father’s standard).
The verb ” try” is defined by Merriam-Webster:
: to make an effort to do something : to attempt to accomplish or complete something
: to do or use (something) in order to see if it works or will be successful
: to do or use (something) in order to find out if you like it
For the sake of this conversation, let’s just go with the first two definitions. Obviously, the third one “to do or use (something) in order to find out if you like it” is very useful with foods, haircuts, new clothes, a new boyfriend etc.
Seeing IF something works is entirely different from being committed to doing it. Attempting to accomplish or complete something takes less intention—and it’s far less uncomfortable—than actually doing it, no excuses allowed. Which is it going to be? “I’ll try.” Or, “It will happen.”
From what I know about people who are successful in business, they don’t try or attempt things. They do them. And that is exactly what my father trained me to do as a young person.
That is also what coaching is about. It’s a collaboration between the performer and the coach to be successful in the goal decided upon. It is not to attempt to be successful.
For those of you who wonder why I am writing this, you are probably not playing the “trying” game. And I would imagine your business is successful.
For those of you who find this blog thought provoking or if it gives you an AHA! moment. Congratulations! Now you can quit “trying” and produce some results.
I would love to hear from you about this topic. Please tell me what you thought about it in the comments below. I am looking forward to hearing from you.
Hi Susan,
What a great reminder your blog is about how easy it is for us to let ourselves off the hook by stating that “I will try” or that “I tried”, rather than to be committed to completing whatever “it” is, no matter what it takes! “I will try” gives us an easy way out. “I will do it, no matter what it takes” is a completely different approach and will always be the more successful approach. In watching others who are successful, I am clear that is their approach. Thanks for this great reminder about the distinction between the two attitudes!
XO, Kim
Thank you Kim!
You jnailed it. We are start “trying” when we forget our intentions. For sure, my father never bought my “trying” and spurred me on to complete my goals. That concept has served me well.
Xo
SJ